One of my least favourite shops in London's "trendy" West End is M&M's world.
Whoever built M&M's World seems to have forgotten that m&m's are just chocolate. They are not an internationally loved figure like, say, Mickey Mouse or Mr Blobby. There's no Jaffa Cake World or Rowntree's Randoms World. But someone somewhere thought that M&M's were deserving of a garish FOUR FLOOR 'theme world' filled with men dressed as giant m&m's, an m&m recreation of the cover of Abbey Road and a life-size London bus BEING DRIVEN BY A MASSIVE M&M.
While other 'worlds', like Disney, have actual rides and things, M&M's World is just a massive supermarket designed to flog cheap tat with the letter M written on it. Twice. (Except much actual chocolate, which is pretty much the only thing I want from a shop called M&M's World.)
Anyway, let's have a look around!
Do you like m&m's? Then you've come to the wrong place. Because even if you LOVED m&m's with a passion, and ate them EVERY DAY for breakfast, this hell-hole would still bore the pants off you. For instance, who in their right mind would want this:
I counted FIVE different types of m&m themed spoons for sale:
Not into spoons? What about chopsticks?
Or maybe give the guys in the office a chuckle with this on Monday morning:
Stuck for a Xmas gift for your grandmother? M&M World has it covered:
No idea what the hell this is:
As you go up to the top floor, you pass these masterpieces:
I was just about to feel them to see if they were real oil paintings, when i saw this.
SORRY I FORGOT I WAS IN A MUSEUM.
While I was in the shop, a teenage girl picked this item up, and genuinely said to her father "It's only ten pounds."
I don't even know what it does. I think it's just an ornament...
Anyway, what if you're a bit of an m&m fan, but you're a damn cool dude and want something a little more subtle? Yeah, sure, you love m&m's, but maybe you don't want to shout about it?
Well, M&M's world has this for you:
Downstairs, you can watch actors pretending to work in some sort of silver m+m laboratory, where laughing m&m 'technicians' pour m&m's into bottles. Some how I doubt it is an accurate representation of what an actual m+m factory really looks like. Outside "The Mix Lab" there's a sort of weird m&m version of Tiffany's, showcasing treasures kept in high security glass cases, such as this, for the classy lady in your life:
And look how a keen m&m collector gazes in awe at this rare m&m chess board:
So by now you could be forgiven for forgetting that m+m'S are actually edible confectionery. Well, hidden away in a corner on floor 3, there are some chocolate m&m's to buy! But by then, you will NEVER WANT TO SEE A M&M AGAIN.
P.S. Please can someone build Twix World.